Getting back in the zone
It’s been about 6 months since I stopped publicly writing articles. I spent majority of that time pushing through various life issues, bad relationships and deciding the direction of my life. Most of all, I had to learn (or re-learn?) how to be happy with myself. When life knocks you down, you gotta get back up.
A Death in the Family
Let’s get the biggest one out of the way. My brother passed away four days prior to new years and that set the tone for the majority of my 2019 thus far. Naturally, like any death in the family, it sucked! In the next four days leading up to 2019, I went on insane drinking binge, crashed on my homie’s couch for a few nights, and did everything possible to run away from the pain. Not my greatest moment.
However, running away and using different distractions to keep me from the reality that he was truly gone didn’t help me heal. It just made me drink harder and a bit more erratic in my behavior. That healing had to come from inside. So throughout January, I took up Hot Yoga sessions as I tried to slow down and regain some lost focus.
As it turns out, yoga is surprisingly enlightening. Hot yoga even more so. It basically works like this: walk into a room that’s hot enough to make you sweat, do yoga poses, listen to soothing music and motivational talk from our instructor. I admit — I thought all of this meditational talk was just hype at first, but it truly made a difference the more I allowed it into my life.
Recently, I haven’t attended any yoga sessions as I have been busy with life once again, but this time I’m way more adept at dealing with negativity now because of it. Let go of what you have lost, and focus on what’s happening right in front of you. Sometimes life is like that.
The Power of Staying Busy
On top of dealing with a sudden grief from the passing of my brother, I was simultaneously also getting bodied by the military. Long story short, I had to work much more than usual during the months of December, January and February. This was due to last-minute issues that led our team, and myself, to crunch hours. That sort of crunch isn’t good in the civilian world. Definitely, wasn’t good for us either. That sort of burnout really takes a toll on you after a while. So not was I grieving, I was also sleep deprived.
Somehow in all of that, I found time to write. Even though I was tired as hell, I wrote. Whatever came to mind, I wrote it. Honestly, most of it was pretty crap in terms of quality. Makes sense given my mind state at the time wasn’t all “flowers and rainbows”. Funny enough, the whole ordeal made me a better writer. By keeping myself, and my thoughts, preoccupied, it helped me get through. At some point, I found a new level of productivity by staying in a constant workflow. Now that my work hours are back to normal, I’m more productive than ever and I’m constantly looking for new ways to keep making progress in my life.
Keep Moving, Stay Fit
Throughout everything, I kept lifting. Actually I never stopped. No matter how busy we became or how tired I was, I would somehow find my back to the gym…or nearest fitness equipment. Fitness allows me to embrace all of that inner energy. It lets me do something about the chaos inside me. Moving, lifting heavy weights, focusing on music — anything is better than sitting still and embracing the despair of what’s happening around me.
When you’re going through a rough period in your life, find something, anything, to get you through. For me, it was writing and a constant love of movement. We all have bad times in life. Just don’t sit there and take it. Stay busy.